capncosmo: Den-Liner heading into time warp (Den-Liner)
[personal profile] capncosmo
Image heavy, as always!

OMGEEZ MOVIE!

I miss Double so much, which I think will be apparent in my thoughts about it.

Anyway!

We start with previews of, like, all the movies I want to see. I can't believe I have to leave before the new Conan comes out D:

And then, the team up! An evil Takeru? GASP. It's not like anyone's ever evil in crossovers.

So, anyway, the movie opens to Double fighting a Tacobar monster and being confused as to why coins come out. They are joined by Terui Ryuu dragging his ginormous sword thing behind him.

Shoutarou: Why don't you transform?
Terui: Ore ni shitumon suru na!

But, so, it gets away, and then Akiko shows up in a wedding dress. Her slipper also has a veil as she proceeds to beat Ryuu from running out of their wedding, and Shoutarou for skipping out when he's supposed to be the one who gives her away. Shoutarou/Philip (I would say something about it being like they're one person, but, uh, that's the point of the show) point out they don't have a choice, they're Kamen Riders. Akiko doesn't take that well, revealing she's the one who confiscated the Accel stuff because she doesn't want any more Kamen Riders in her life, and she runs off.

Philip takes this opportunity to find Terui Ryuu's despair "fascinating." I love Philip.

Turns out, what's actually bothering her is that being a Kamen Rider is what got her father killed, and that's why Shoutarou has to give her away, even though he had promised to at least be there for her wedding. While she is by herself, the monster from before attacks her with the Memory memory, which pulls her into a ~flashback~

~~~~~wavy lines~~~~

She's back in 1999, where Soukichi is roasting his own coffee beans, and his partner, Matsu, is telling him to use the stuff he researched on it. Soukichi refuses on the grounds that coffee is a partner he met before Matsu. Also because he refuses everything (no, seriously).

Aside: Soukichi is definitely the Sam Spade to Shoutarou's Philip Marlowe, oh my GOSH.

Matsu appears to be Soukichi's Philip, researching things and stuff like that. Also, there is somehow more subtext between the two of them than there is between Shoutarou and Philip. But only for this

Anyway, he gets a call from Melissa, who is SO EXACTLY LIKE AKIKO she's played by Yamamoto Hikaru. Now, I know what you're thinking, but don't. This is a KR movie, remember?

Melissa is his "important adopted sister," and she's been getting threats from the mysterious Spiderman, er-- Kumootoko. So he and Matsu go to the concert hall to protect her (except he's threatened the audience, not her?). WELCOME TO THE LOVE TRIANGLE. Melissa sings while Matsu fills us in on the shady head of her talent agency, but then! Spiders! Everywhere! Biting all the peeps!

Kumootoko comes down from the rafters saying how she should sing only for him, and the police burst in with Officer Jinno in front!! The police are basically useless, but Soukichi is there to punch people in the face.

Little boy: He's so cool!
Little girl: We should get out of here, Shou-chan!

Oh yes they did. Then the police evacuate everyone. Anyway, with Shoutarou and Marina out safely, Kumootoko and a weirdo bat lady tell Soukichi all about the Gaia Memories and then get away.

Melissa comes back with Matsu, and Soukichi promises her he'll stop Kumootoko. Then she's dragged off by her manager man.

Soukichi goes to the garage where Philip eventually lives, and look, it's Shroud. They are apparently childhood friends. She says he should use a memory to fight Kumootoko, and he refuses.

Matsu heads off to the actual library to research, and tells Soukichi lots of that company's singer disappear mysteriously. He also jokes with Soukichi that maybe he should count up how many women he's made cry one day.

Soukichi goes and asks That One Guy for help (you know, that guy with the wooden bear or whatever), and That One Guy sets him up with Stone, as dude who will help him break into the offices of the talent agency. When they break in, they find out the singers are all using the gaia memories as recreational drugs/being used by them as test subjects. Soukichi kicks some butts, but gets in trouble when Kumootoko and Bat appear.

He almost dies getting thrown into a wall, but Shroud shows up and makes him transform into Skull. Unfortunately, the transformation isn't really complete, so he ends up getting crushed, and while he's getting crushed, Akiko calls. Turns out, it's her birthday, and why can't he ever come back to Osaka, for serious. He promises he'll totally be there for her wedding, hangs up the phone, and then OWNS the bulldozer that was crushing him.


~~~~~wavy lines~~~~

At this point, Terui Ryuu shakes Akiko awake, while Philip and Shoutarou go to fight the monster thing off. She, however, wants to continue the memory, so she grabs on to the monster's leg as it flies off.


~~~~~wavy lines~~~~

After the battle, Soukichi corners the president guy, but he says he doesn't know anything about it, and before he can say more, the dude's wife comes up to tell Soukichi to leave him alone. When she touches her husband, a red spider crawls off of her and onto him, making him EXPLODE.

Soukichi looks at the message left by Kumootoko in webbing on the wall, and realizes Kumootoko's "1"s have a distinctive shape. He storms off.

...Back to the library, where he punches Matsu in the face. BECAUSE IT WAS MATSU THE WHOLE TIME. As he's busy beating up, Matsu, Melissa appears and says that Matsu only took the memory to save her. Also, it turns out those spider things are made for killing the person you love most when you touch them, and Melissa's got one in her arm. Matsu is so overcome with jealously that he decides to "make it so you can never touch her, either," and puts one on Soukichi. Then, he sends a whole bunch out into the city, and we see all sorts of people exploding as they touch their loved ones. Soukichi hesitates, and Kumootoko gets away, Melissa in tow.

Soukichi goes to fight him, but first he has to face Bat. This time, though, he tranforms properly AND puts his hat on. She ends up exploding when the tanker she hijaked crashes and pins her leg. And then, you know, explodes because it was full of gasoline and Soukichi refused to save her.

He goes to the bridge where Matsu has Melissa.

Skull: One: I didn't see the darkness in my partner's heart. Two: I lost the will to fight for a moment. Three: I made the city cry because of it.
Matsu: What are you doing?
Skull: I'm counting my sins. さあ、お前の罪を数えろ!

(Impartial Factual Fact: This was REALLY COOL.)

They fight, and Skull wins, leaving Matsu to die. Soukichi walks off, leaving Melissa to run to his side, crying. Melissa says he's cruel, that he promised to save Matsu. He says that Matsu heart had already been eaten by the Memory.

~~~~~wavy lines~~~~

Akiko comes back to find herself on the same bridge as in the memory of her father. The monster is apparently trying to use the strength of the memory there for nefarious purposes.

AND NOW, OOOZE.

Tacobar also opens with a wedding, but it's for a movie. Eiji takes their pay and proceeds to hand it out to the "troubled" people in the neighborhood. Hina objects that he's being had, and he replies that them not actually being troubled is even better :D!

Cakeman, meanwhile, is planning to revive Oda Nobunaga(!?!?!?!?) He, of course, bakes a birthday cake, but it seems Nobunaga is not in the mood for festivities. He runs out.

Then, some monster is asking people if they killed him, killing them, and then writing an X through a family crest and dropping it on the body. GEE, I WONDER WHAT THAT COULD BE ABOUT. Eiji and him fight a bit, but he gets away. Then Eiji finds this troubled young man who COULDN'T POSSIBLY BE THE MONSTER. (Oh, Eiji.)

Dude doesn't even speak Japanese properly, but thanks to Eiji giving him matching underwear and showing him how to wear them properly, he is thus empowered to go to the library and read all the books there. Reading the books makes him a computer genius, which gets him hired at a company. When he gets hired, he then buys out the company and becomes the president.

He does this at a dance audition for Hina's sempai, who I'm not sure if she's a movie only character of not. Sempai clearly wants to be a ballerina, and refuses to sell out and do hip hop dance just to get a job. They have, like, a party or something (Eiji, Hina, Oda Nobunaga, Sempai).

Then, Oda Nobunaga takes over more and more, and gets in a bidding war at auction with Cakeman over a teavase that originally belonged him. Nobunaga offers him all the shares in his company for the teavase.

Cakeman, later, gives Nobunaga the Birth Belt. He uses it only once, but at least makes sure to call the press so they can see him.

Eiji comes in to Nobunaga's office, having gotten a part time job to clean there, and Nobunaga calls him a boring man with no ambition and tells him to get out.

Eiji: Nobu-kun D:

Hina and Eiji watch Sempai dance, and Nobunaga shows up offstage to kill her, but is OVERCOME by her BEAUTY. He then decides she's his now. She, understandably, tells him to go die in a fire. He reacts to this reasonably by trying to kill her. Some rubble falls on her feet!

Eiji doesn't help her and instead is resigned to fight him. Hina eventually does, but she runs off to get help, and the Greed make a monster try to eat her want to dance.

It interrupts Eiji and Nobunaga's fight, and Eiji pulls out the three green coins to defeat it.

Nobunaga wants to know how Eiji can go on living even when he has no ambition, and Eiji says, "well, it's nice. The sky is blue." (What *is* it with KR and blue skies?) Nobunaga laughs slightly crazily and says he sees Eiji's point. He then goes to the hospital and heals Sempai's leg. Unfortunately, Doll Man is there and puts some core medals in him.

Nobunaga staggers out of the hospital and rasps at Eiji to kill him before transforming into a monster. Ankh appears randomly to tell Eiji he should fight, because Nobunaga was dead and probably has been dead from the beginning. They fight, while Sempai's dance is overlay-ed. THIS WAS REALLY TRIPPY. Once Nobunaga is defeated, he can see her dancing there, and apparently so can Eiji(!?). He asks Eiji to give her a flower he pulls out of nowhere, except then she'd gone and so is the flower and he's dead. Eiji is really sad, but then the core medals fly out of him and ALL THE WAY TO FUUTO(!?)

TEAM UP!

Philip, Shoutarou and Terui show up on the bridge just in time to see the core medals combine with the Memory memory to make a GIANT KAMEN RIDER OF FIRE, Kamen Rider Core. He smashes the bridge, separating the three of them from Akiko and Eiji, who's come to save her. She sees Eiji's belt and gets really upset, saying that's it, she's had it with these MFing Kamen Riders in this MFing movie. Eiji says there are some people who have to fight.

Akiko: Why!?
Eiji: Dunno.

(Oh, Eiji.)

Anyway, it turns out GKRoF is drawing his power from the planet's core. Shoutarou and Philip are like "So, we meet again!" and then they and Eiji go off to the core. GKRoF makes his legs in to a GIANT FIRE MOTORCYCLE and follows.

Meanwhile, on the surface, the monster is chasing Terui Ryuu and Akiko. He takes the Accel stuff and says he can't give up being a KR because he wants to protect her. She is apparently okay with this now, she he beats up the monster, assisted by Birth.

After a HARROWING JOURNEY OF CG, the two riders and Ankh lose GKRoF, and stand in front of the core.

Shoutarou: And so blah blah [turns to the side] NA!?!?
OOO: Oh, uh, don't mind this guy.
Ahkh: [refuses to let Eiji hide him behind his back]
Shoutarou: What do you mean!? It's a hand!! [Looks at own hand] Heh heh.
Ahkh: Anyway, maybe you should destroy it.

So, they do, except that's apparently not enough? GKRoF goes on about how he's going to use all the anger of the KRs for evil or something, but

Shoutarou: You don't understand anything about being a Kamen Rider at all.
Philip: Being a Kamen Rider is about fighting for other people's happiness, even if you have to give up your own.
W: さあ、お前の罪を数えろ!
OOO: THAT WAS SO COOL. [To Ankh] Do you think we should think up something like that?
Ankh: Focus!

Eiji gets in trouble, but Ankh throws him the other two red medals, and for a second it looks like it was too late, but then! EIJI! FLYING RAINBOW PEACOCK! He also uses his power to turn W into Golden Shining Extreme and give them wings too. They defeat GKRoF.

Philip and Shoutarou come back up in Fuuto, and they and Accel detransform and promptly remember the wedding that was starting 1.5 hours from when the movie started. Birth walks off and reveals himself to be Moody Motorcycle Man.

Eiji comes up in Rio, just in time to dance with the owner of the restaurant Hina works at in Carnival. The two of them eventually make it back to Japan.

Shoutarou and Akiko are standing outside the chapel, when Melissa comes up to them! Turns out, the spider that was in Soukichi's arm didn't die with Matsu, so on the bridge he made Melissa promise to sing at Akiko's wedding since he could never touch her again.

Akiko: You mean the one he loved most was--!?

...Yes, stupid.

As the ceremony begins, Shoutarou comes to sit beside Philip, and Philip looks puzzled, but he just motions over his shoulder. And there, look, ghost of Oyassan!!!! She and Terui get married, happily ever after, Mazel Tov. :D



And then after the credits they half previewed the 40th anniversary KR movie, which is apparently a giant team up. How shocking.


















From the movie pamphlet:


Tiny Shoutarou and Marina


Matsu, Melissa, Shroud (and That One Guy is in the corner)


Nobunaga (He played some guy I don't remember in Faiz, if you thought he looked familiar)

on 2010-12-21 12:31 pm (UTC)
defeatedbyabridge: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] defeatedbyabridge
Hee, thanks for posting this. I know very little about OOO so skipped those parts, but the W stuff looks fun.

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capncosmo

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